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Relationships are precarious little endeavors. One moment you could think things are going perfectly well, the next it’s over. What are you going to do?
There are an infinite amount of variables that can affect someone’s love and friendship to you and the chance for a once happy relationship to go off the rails. However, there are tell tale signs your guy might be ready to call it quits.
Signs of Severance
One of the first things to look out for is distance. Ever heard the stereotypical phrase “I need some space,” well this could be one of your first warning signs. Following the pleas for distance is being ignored, and feeling as if the two of you aren’t even together even if he’s right there with you.
If the two of you are together and he’s always checking his phone and not being present in the moment, then this is another telltale sign. If being ignored continues onto the digital field in terms of social media and texting or phone calls then you know something is up.
It might even be that he is talking with other people but for one reason or another doesn’t find the time to give you the time of the day. This isn’t good and shouldn’t have to be put up with by anyone.
Change of Mood
While you can tell a lot from he doesn’t say, the same is true for what he does say. For example if he’s been fighting for no reason and irritable is another red flag. The few times he is around he isn’t really contributing to any conversation and being snappy and quick to judge anything you say.
A lot of people would rather just not be around in order to signal that they are losing interest and perhaps for you to get the hint. The excuses for not being around anymore will be varied. He’ll either be working more or find any excuse to be out with friends or family.
Once all of these things begin to add up over the course of time, even you may not want to even continue the relationship. The emotional and physical states of the relationship are no longer the same and it just becomes different. Once you’ve picked up on these things, you can do something about it in either direction.
Making a Decision
If things go south, you may be thinking will he come back? There are a few caveats to be made if you’re going to worry about something like that or even allow it to go that far in the first place. One of your first orders of business should be communication. Yes, that simple basis of human interaction. If you guys have been going out and in a relationship for a long time, you both know if one of you has been acting differently lately. Try to figure out why and talk to the other person about it. There is no use in both playing passive aggressive games to one another while you relationship may be on the rocks.
Once those signs start to surface, simply ask what is wrong. If you get one-word answers like nothing, well you know the answer to that. It wouldn’t be wrong to act proactively and say well then why not end it now. There’s no reason to stay if both sides aren’t committed. The old adage is true, if you let it free and it comes back to you, then it was true. If not you’re better off alone with people who care.
Preventative Measures
Maybe you don’t want it to end. In this case communication is still key. See what can be done and just be honest with the questions. Before making any drastic moves and taking measures to end things, see if that’s what would be best for the two of you. There’s the possibility that he really only needs some space for some other personal issue you’re not privy to.
If there is still a spark of romance between the two of you then see if there is anything you could do to help. Sometimes these breaking up signs are something not even he really wants.
In the end it’s about weighing a variety of choices. It’s dependent on a lot of things and that requires effort on both ends of a relationship. If it’s worth it go for it, if not let the natural progression of things take its course.
About the Author
Callum Summers writes about love, lust, breaking up, and making up. He is a relationship/marriage therapist with a number of years experience under his belt.